One night in biblioteca

RTQ learned how to make a widget. I think it is a widget to read the unsuspecting minds of those ever threatening Sasquatch hunters that roam the night air of Austin. I thank God for men like RTQ that wrestle the things that go bump in the night.

Rainbow Peppermint (a new addition to this sage in the biblioteca) came in and photocopied a bunch of stuff in Greek, Latin, and/or Sanskrit. I think she is writing a dissertation on the things people make up when they do not understand a language. She tried to talk to us about the high price of sour milk in southeast Asia and the effects it may or may not have (this opinion wildly differs according to ones political persuasion) upon the southern Ural mountains. I personally think she has had a bit too much wine.

I shared this opinion with her and she laid into me like a sailor. It was one profane description after another. She expelled vulgarity like she was a waist gunner mowing down folks in one of those war movies. I sat there shocked and dismayed. I could do no more. I put up my thumb and bit it. She went crazy!


I returned her volley with, “YES! I bite my thumb. Sir”


“Yes, I bite my thumb, but at thee?” I offer.

“DO YOU BITE YOUR THUMB AT ME SIR?!? ” She exclaimed in a raucous voice that was filled with every bit of heaven and hell. A voice so loud God arrived to quite the disturbance in the biblioteca.

“Lo, my thumb is bite but at thee?” I deliver a peace offering…

With the sailor exhausted from sailing the vulgar ocean of plenty she returned to the foreign study of language of yore.

RTQ I noticed crawled from out of the desk. He really climbed out of the desk drawer, from whence he was hiding during the vulgar barrage from Sailor Peppermint. He excused himself and went to the kitchen to microwave a corny dog. I asked him to microwave me a burrito. One so hot that God could not carry it. His reply was, “Then how am I supposed to bring it to you out of Christian love? If God can not carry it then certainly I, a humble book servant am not worth or equipped to handle such a task.”

Then a voice from heaven spoke up and said, “RTQ I have chosen you to microwave that burrito and it is I your Lord God that brought you out of Oklahoma that shall provide you the strength and thermal prowess to lift that burrito.

So RTQ did microwave that burrito and bring it to me. I pray for the strength and fortitude to eat that burrito…thanks be to God. The burrito has been vanquished.

Even Rainbow Peppermint rejoiced in this.

See you next week or Wednesday here at the biblioteca.

*all names have been changed to protect the innocent. If there are an coincidences of any living people then seriously I have not worked hard enough to protect those people and they should be chained to a tire for the remainder of their life.

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